depression musings on the fly rants 

Masochistic Tendencies

I want to rip my chest open and pull out my heart. I want the feeling center of my brain to stop. I just want to be numb. The people I interact with day-to-day have no idea of the complete fuck up I am. Or if they are aware, they sure do a great job and keep it to themselves. I live with extremes in my mind every day. Today it is just amplified.  It’s all part of the sickness within me. I know this. The demons I’ve conquered are banging…

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musings on the fly 

Fall Mood

Here it goes again…   The temperature begins to cool, the sun goes to sleep, and everything in nature begins to die. Yes, it is that time of year again – and I am in a mood.  Nothing fits me better right now than my black jacket, bat-winged black shirt, tired and worn blue jeans (I don’t care if they are snug around my hips and ass), and my favorite pair of (shit kickers) Doc Martens. I ruin one more towel in my bathroom (and stain the sink and floor)…

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