For part one, go to: The Dating Rat Race
Last week, on a whim, I decided to revise and reactivate my personal ad on POF (Plenty of Fish); I like to call it social experiment number two. It will be a short-lived social experiment this time around – I am giving it one week.
My new and improved ad was almost immediately met with a barrage of the usual replies, in no particular order:
- Guys wanting to cheat
- Guys wanting to “hit it n’ quit it” – no strings, FWB, DTF
- Guys with no photos and/or incomplete profiles
- Guys that obviously do not know good grammar, punctuation and proper spelling (big pet peeve!)
- Guys that obviously did not read my ad: i.e., short, black, young
- Commentary on the contents of my ad: i.e., I’m being too picky
- Rude and unacceptable comments about my physique
The following is my ad, word for word, as it is on POF now.
“I am a down to earth and creative girl who has experienced a lot of joy and pain in my short time on this earth. I possess an unquenchable fire and passion for life, love, travel and adventure. I have sexy, dangerous curves that only an experienced, older man can handle properly.
I am seeking a creative minded and intelligent man who is emotionally and mentally secure, older, tall (5’10″+) and Caucasian (white), with above average… equipment and stamina. No, I’m not joking about anything I just listed – I just know what I want and I refuse to compromise.
I have no time for drama filled boys and guys – I want a man.
If you think you can keep up enough to walk beside me and be my friend, lover, confidant, partner in crime and companion, then by all means let me know and perhaps we can get to know each other and go from there. I am open to a relationship with the right man, if we click. To the right man, I have a plethora to offer.
If you plan on seducing me, you’d better first appeal to and arouse my biggest sexual organ – my brain. I’m looking for a real connection, not a passing fling. I’m too old for games and drama.
Are you up to the challenge? Only the brave and daring need reply…”
One of my exes read my revised ad and informed me that I am too bitchy, intimidating, condescending, full of attitude and too exact and critical in my ad.
I don’t believe I am closed minded, picky or bitchy. I have standards. I know what I like. I know what I need and want in a companion and relationship.
This is one of many reasons he is an ex.
The right man will not feel intimidated, he will feel challenged.
The right man will not see me as condescending, bitchy and full of attitude, he will see me as confident and strong.
The right man will not think I am being too exact or critical, he will think, “this woman knows what she wants!”
The right man will want to know more about me and pursue me further, because his vibration is on the same wave length as mine.
He’s out there somewhere, probably going through his own personal hell, just as I am, wondering when he’s going to meet the right woman.
If anything, I am patient.
I have confidence that when the time is right, our paths will cross – maybe for the first time or perhaps once again. When that happens, everything will be just as it should, and all of this nonsense won’t matter anymore.
This will all be worth it – for both of us.