imposter syndrome poser dysfunctional family musings 

Poser: Impostor Syndrome

Poser /ˈpōzər/ noun a person who acts in an affected manner in order to impress others. synonyms: exhibitionist, poseur, posturer, fake   Rewind back to the 1980’s with me… Remember calling those fakes who would come to the clubs or shows a poser? That was the ultimate insult in the scene! Fast forward to today… Ever since I got an email last week telling me that a piece of my art made it past the jury selection and is going to be in The Detroit Dirty Show (International Erotic Art Exhibition),…

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depression musings poetry 

Depression Madness

The demons are after me tonight My own personal demons  In my head Birthed at an early age They’ve lived here forever And tonight they are Twisting and turning Dancing and churning Fucking with my thoughts The logical processes in my mind Whispering in my ears Yelling in my mind Giving me tunnel vision  They keep coming Attacking Have you ever swallowed your screams? Tonight I do just that The demons they are Suffocating me I can only scream in my head If I let this breath escape me they will  Overtake me  It’s…

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classic alternative mix tape musings relationships 

My Heart Could Use Some Glasses…

I was just like any other boy crazy girl in my youth. I did more than my fair share of chasing boys around the playground in my elementary days. I loved playing pretend superhero games where I was the villain (mostly Catwoman to the boys Batman) and having them capture me. Sometimes I’d play the comic book heroine Wonder Woman and trap the boys with my “golden lasso”. We exercised our imaginations fully as children of the 1970’s. In the beginning of my high school years, I was attracted to…

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musings poetry 

The Moon, The Stars, and You

In the formidable  Darkness of the night I gaze upon the moon and stars Reflected in the Sparkling water; The light of the moon Mystically magical Glistening like liquid silver, Rippling in the waves. You should be here… I gaze at the brightest star, And think of you… Your eyes,  Mesmerizing as the moon and Tranquil as the water Hiding within a soul As mysterious as The stars themselves.  I long to hold you Close to my heart. But you are like the stars — Sparkling and dazzling So near,…

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classic alternative gothic industrial on the fly 

Industrial Reconstruction of Self

Industrial Music. Hard-edged, rough and hollow sounds, most of the time with dark, smashing, in-your-face lyrics from bands such as Nine Inch Nails, Ministry, KMFDM, Thrill Kill Kult, and Front 242.   When I hear these powerful sounds from my favorite Industrial bands, my insides quake, making me want to not only dance but to become introspective and examine where in my life I need an overhaul – an industrial reconstruction of myself. It’s a call to greatness that I cannot quite explain. Industrial and Electronic Beats have this effect on…

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