my big fat gay punk rock prom 1990 classic alternative darkwave gothic industrial life mix tape new wave punk relationships youth 

My Big (Fat Gay) Punk Rock Prom

  Let me take you on a trip back to a much simpler time, when we didn’t have to worry about adult responsibilities and the complexities that come with them. So please, if you will, enter into my pseudo-TARDIS for a fun trip back in time to…   May 1990 After a long, cold winter, it was finally springtime in Northeast Ohio; the trees and flowers were bursting forth in all of their glory and the air was warm once again. I just turned eighteen and looked forward to graduating…

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the cure depeche mode classic alternative Depeche Mode life mix tape music The Cure 

Sad Bastard Music

Many many moons ago I was young, naïve, and married. Not very long into my marriage, my eyes opened as to why getting married was a big mistake. Little things – or signs as I always refer to these happenings – started piling up into bigger things. One of which was my ex’s disdain for Goth and Punk music.  Ummm hello… who do you think you married? It’s not like I hid the fact I was different – my appearance made it more than clear that I was an “alterna-chick”,…

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depression mix tape music 

Fighting for Happiness

  I used to say January was the hardest part of winter to get through because it is so cold, the days are short, and it seems like the sun will never shine again.    However, after some consideration, I think the hardest part is the end of winter, with the roller coaster of temperatures and mixture of rainy and snowy days.  Welcome to bipolar weather Ohio, also known as March. Right now it is 21º, with a projected high of 28º today – just a few days ago it was…

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depression gothic industrial life mix tape music musings 

Dancing With Depression & Anxiety

  My nights out dancing at the 80’s music revival nights are bittersweet at best these days.   On one side I am enamored by the music of my younger, more carefree days. I get lost in the song and dance. At times I close my eyes and imagine I am still that young, naïve, and lost little girl, reveling in hearing nothing but the melodic whispers of youth, and a future filled with hope. When I attend these events, I almost always recognize a lot of faces – mostly from…

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classic alternative darkwave Goth horror punk mix tape music 

Nevermore: Samhain 2016

  Autumn always shows us how absolutely beautiful it is to let things go.    To allow the wounds of the past fade into splashes of spectacular color. To finally let them die and float away in celebration of another year that has come to an end.  For some it is also time to reach up and out to prune off dead branches that hinder future growth. The other branches might have hidden them with new life and extensions around it, but the tree knows better – no need to feed those…

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