depression life musings on the fly 


I’m feeling all kinds of “dis” lately – discord, distanced, disarmed, disenchanted, disappointed, disheartened, and most of all, disconnected.    I’m not sure if it’s my mental illness at work, brain fog, or just stress, that is causing this mental unrest. There are days my body just wants to shut down on me, while my brain whirs away at 100 million miles per hour. At night I grind my teeth, causing me horrible jaw pain and headaches during the days. I’m also living with varying bouts of fatigue and insomnia, leading to…

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depression mix tape music 

Distraction – Where is My Mind?

I have been a horrible blogger.   I went from at least one new post a week, to almost nothing. I feel awful about this. I have written, though, on my other website, Punk Rock Flea Market Lorain (PRFM Lorain).  So far it’s been a summer filled with lots of activity with building my business, getting the word out there about what PRFM Lorain is all about, plus the crazy chaos of my un-medicated mind. That last one has wreaked havoc, a lot – from spirals of over thinking to paralyzing apathy.…

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depression musings poetry 

Spiraling Madness [poetry]

I decided to do some writing recently while in the midst of a depression spiral… this is the result.     The demons are after me tonight My own personal demons In my head Birthed at an early age They’ve lived here forever And tonight they are Twisting and turning Dancing and churning Fucking with my thoughts The logical processes in my mind Whispering in my ears Yelling in my mind Giving me tunnel vision They keep coming Attacking Have you ever swallowed your screams? Tonight I do just that…

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depression life 

Meteorites: Random thoughts of a troubled and artistic mind

Various notes, random thoughts, verse and more from my iPhone over the past few years. I like to call these tidbits Meteorites, after the song by Echo and The Bunnymen – it just fits.  Life take it’s toll… cursed by mortality… Life’s lost soldiers on the march Leaving their trenches now… Nights got cold as life got dark Freezing the senses now Can it be found… can it be found? Please be found, please be found, please be found     Screaming screaming screaming in my head but it never takes…

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classic alternative Depeche Mode depression Goth life music 

Peace of mind can’t be bought…

I found treasure not where I thought Peace of mind can’t be bought Still I believe   Just hang on Suffer well Sometimes it’s hard It’s hard to tell   It is winter, but there is no snow – not yet at least. Usually it is the snow, with its cold, lingering drab and grey dullness that causes my mood to drop into a downward spiral. Not this year. While we’ve been blessed with many sunny days and warmer than usual temperatures so far this winter, my body and mind know…

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